Somebody find me somebody to love

I have spent alot of time looking around for the right guy in my life and I never seem to get lucky.but here in the last month or so I have been getting alot of looks and glances from all kinds of guys.one guy keeps asking me out, this guy cant be more then 17 and donesnt look like hes saveing yet!then there was the ice cream dude *if you read my last blog it will tell you about him*

I keep putting myself into a rock in a hard place!right now I have met a new guy.we are into the same things and for the most part, we have alot in common other then he likes Trent Reznor, whom I can not stand!

I did the girl thing over this, weak in the knees kinda bullshit.stuff I just dont do over just anyone.but my friend has popped back up, I am really in like with him.yes I said like it isnt a type-o.I now feel like a whore but havent done anthing that would make me a whore but non the less I do.

I am a whats happening now kinda gal and yes I like to flirt and play the feild so to speak but Im just not used to haveing to make choices like this.I could go on and on about how I cant really get guys.I do and I dont!Im picky and I just dont like haveing to make up my mind in this way.

so its pretty much like this

A)take a chance on something new *again*

B)stick with the old choice

C)or just dont make up my mind and run away screaming to my room and keep doing the Im going to be alone bull crap I have always done

for the most part I feel like shit for talking to these guys at the same time, yea Im not with either of them nor am I sleeping with them.I mostly feel like this cus I like both of them at the same time and I know it isnt fair to do that.not only is it not fair to them its not fair to myself!haveing to make my mind up is hard for me, as I said Im not used to haveig this put on my plate.

why are guys flocking to me like this?!I dont get it, I dont wear shirts that show half my clevage.Im a t shit wearing tom boy for fuck sake!and how is eatting an ice cream cone sexy if your not doing it on purpose?or just walking down the street?

why are men so fucking stupid?!why now?

In heat?

ok this is creaping me out this was my day..I get off work early and I was crossing the sreet to go see a friend,I get to the cross walk and this younger guy walks up and asks me if I had a smoke to bum and if I was single!later my mom tells me that one of our dogs has gone missing.Im on the phone with her talking about what we are going to do and if she is up to comeing to get me.just about 5 minutes before I was like I would like some ice cream.Im on the phone with her and this guy walks by.I look up and take a bite and right as I do this guy walks by and looks right at me as I take a bite.he stoped dead in his tracks and looks at me like he was about to jump me and fuck me right there..sure I thought he was cute but it was weird!he stood there for like a minute, looking at me.all I could do was take another bite and blurt out a shy hi..I must be in heat or something couse I have no clue whats going on!

just yesterday I got hit on by this older biker guy that looks like mr.cleans grandfather.he walked right up to me and said I was the prettist girl there and that I had nice hair,bright eyes and a nice smile.

creeeeeeeeepy

Yours Truely

I do alot of thinking involving what I want to do with my love life.do I want to stay single or do I want to whore around?

I just cant bring myself to whore around, sorry not a sleep with just any guy kinda girl.but I do want to spend time when a member of the other sex.could it be that I respect myself more then others not to whore around?I just think I have alot of selfrespect!

my mother says that your 20's is for sleepig around with all the wrong people, I guess its true there are 1 or 2 guys I would have rather not been with, do to the fact they were really dumb.other then that Im a good girl, I dont do drugs or sleep with random people.I pride myself in being someone who knows the meaning of selfrespect.

but being single sucks, I mean I dont understand why all the men or should I say boys I have dated just treated me like crap and left me with the idea in my head "must be my falt" it does put you down alot haveing that kida thing happen to you a few times.I mean are all men stupid or is there sign over my head that saying something like dumbass magnet?or I just dont really know my type?

well I dont know truthfuly.seems to me that most guys just want one thing or another and if one of things isnt being given up they just bail.yea when im with someone I want to fuck as much as I can.now tell me what guy that really wants a girl that doesnt cheat or treats him badly wouldnt mind a girl that wants to fuck alot?thing is none of the ex's wanted to fuck alot they couldnt keep up with me!

bah I just dont get it.